if i knew, i'd tell you

Why not?.....ten day challenge.

day ten.

1. I miss having classes with you. I miss hanging out with you. I miss picking on you. I miss you picking on me. I miss trips to moes. I miss stealing your homework. I miss football games in the cold. I miss seeing you everyday. I miss you.

2. I thought you were different but I was so wrong. You lied to me, I lied to you. We are both liars. The sad thing is we both trusted each other. Whats so weird is the fact that we still trust each other with most everything. I'm sorry for hurting you..I never wanted to. I just didn't know how to say what I felt  because I was afraid it would hurt you. Turns out not saying it...only hurt you more. 

3.  Please go away....far far away. And never come back. ever.

4. It took eighteen years for me to finally become friends with you. It took me eighteen years to realize I needed you. It took me eighteen years to actually realize how much I love you. You are my bestfriend...and the coolest sister ever.

5. I don't know where to start with this one. When you think about it...I really haven't known you that long yet you've become someone I feel as if I've known my whole life.You care. You listen. I can be my complete self around you and tell you anything without you judging me. We talk about the weirdest stuff, i mean WEIRD. You hurt me but it doesn't matter because whether you believe it or not you're still pretty great. I miss you more than you can imagine.

6. You and I have a bond like no other. You understand everything i've been through. We've kinda been through it together. You always know the right thing to say....and I know I can count on you with anything. I love you.

7. If I was to type what I really felt about you...i'd be typing for years. You and I are like the polar opposites yet we've be inseparable for six years and I plan on it being that way for the rest of our lives. One thing I know for sure is I couldn't live without you. I refuse to let college separate us.I love you. I love you. and yes, I know you know this. Btw, you're going to make the best journalism teacher ever. ping pong and chicken nuggets.

8. You make me laugh constantly with your insults. We always have the best times when we are together. I miss the way things were in the past. You know everything about me...and yet you've never once judged me. You're the only guy I fully trust. I love you.

9. We fight....a lot.......over nothing. However you're one of the only people that understands me. You put up with my crap on  a day to day basis and that takes skill. You don't deserve a lot of the things that you go through but know i'll always be here, even when i'm at college. I'll drive back in a heart beat. I don't know what I'm going to do not being able to see you everyday. Please never change...I love you to the moon and back.

10. I'll never be good enough to make you happy. I try so hard to make you proud yet I always seem to fall short. 

one confession:

i need to learn how to say no. 

it's times like these i thank God i'm alive.

So, it has been a while but considering I haven't been in the country...you're gonna have to cut me some slack.

For all of you that didn't know, I spent my Thanksgiving in the dominican republic with the people I babysit for...they've pretty much become my second family considering they take me everywhere with them and sometimes I spend more time at their house than I spend at my own. They love me....a lot. I left for the dominican republic exactly a week ago today. I got back into the united states late last night after quite an interesting week.

To start off with, the drinking age in the dominican republic is 18. I'm 18 and I drank A LOT....of sprite....but chose not to drink any alcohol. Any other 18 year old would of had a field day, but not this kid. I feel as if I have a role model image to uphold....drinking somewhat destroys this image regardless if it's legal or not. I figure if I can reject drinks all week...where they are free and it's legal to drink as much as I want...I can reject them in college easily.

Today should be a good one...at least i'm hoping. I'm currently helping my parents move stuff from my grandmother's house and then I should be home to get ready. I get to see Jennifer and Adam..finally! :)

I could go on and on for days...but i've gotta get back to work.

I'll leave you with this...

"To have self-control is knowing you can, but deciding you won't."

 

One Confession:

i'm stuck in a never ending battle.

 

 

yeahh

I've been babysitting all weekend.

moral of the story is...

don't have kids.

the end.

i need a title

So I told myself I was going to try to keep up with this thing....but I've kinda failed.This week has been somewhat of a roller coaster with the stresses of school (senior concept), college, people, and parents. 

FINALLY the senior concept paper is over. Although the whole project isn't over, a lot of stress is gone now that the research paper part is over with. I feel much better now. 

Today I sent in my final college application. I must say it is also a relief to have all of them submitted. AND my mother can no longer be on my butt about submitting them. Score! I've already received two acceptance letters from both Charleston Southern University and Anderson University. I should know whether I've been accepted into the other two in December....and then I can finally make the decision of which one I want to attend.  

People are mean. I don't understand why it is necessary to be mean all the time....would it kill people to be kind every once in a while?

My parents really stress me out. They expect so much from me and sometimes it can be a bit overwhelming. They need to learn how to chill.

One confession:

It's time for a change.

welcome to reality

Today really wasn't that great. My dad woke me up at four forty-five in the morning to make me get up and help look for his keys....he acted like I knew where they were. Heck if I know what he did with his keys, and why the heck would I even care...it was four forty-five in the morning. My car is broke...like legit broke and won't be fixed until sometime next week. I'm in a slight state of depression because of this. 

I NEED MY CAR. 

One Confession

Have you ever wanted something you know you'll never get? 

I have this problem, and it sucks. 

legit.

no school?

No car + no food = boring day.

enough said.

one confession

I regret trusting people.

you can't always get what you want

So I kinda forgot about this thing until humpty dumpty reminded me about it....so here goes a recap of my life since October 25.

My week was kinda long, which is really nothing out of the ordinary. School is stressing me out big time, but whats new? Marching band is finally over...except for football games which means I actually get my social life back. It's nice to actually have a little bit of free time to do something other than blow my dern horn.

so this brings me to friday night...

I went to the football in which we beat South Florence...I've kinda got mixed emotions on this win. Because we won, it means there is a great possibility we may have yet another home football game...which means I might have to march....AGAIN. Depressing, I know. But it's all good, I guess. After the game I went to a lock in at my  church.

saturday

Saturday marked my 6,570th day of life aka 18 years. I went to tour Presbyterian College that morning with my mother. I wasn't toooooo excited about going, but it really wasn't as bad as I thought. The people there were really nice and seemed to genuinely care about my plans for the future. I might actually go to college there. After that I came home and went to the AAAA State Championships for marching band. White Knoll won. :))))))))

After that jennifer and adam came over....and brought me cupcakes. They love me. Jennifer spent the night, which is always an adventure. 

sunday

We all got up and went to church. The usual for sunday. After church Jennifer came over again and we watched a movie..aka jennifer took a nap. :) Then we went back to church for youth group and then came home.

Finally, monday

Today wasn't the best. Ashhole started my day off bad by yelling at me and it was all down hill from there. Matt, Hayley, and I all had a nice trip planned for tomorrow, but considering the fact that I have no luck, the plans crumbled to the ground. 

one confession,

i miss someone.